Feeling Every Bit Like Friday Night

So hey there.

It's Friday night again - these are beginning to rub elbows, they're coming so close together, it seems.

Here it is - Friday night, the evening most folks live for, and I'm just contemplating cashing in my chips early, calling it a night...at the crazy hour of 8:30ish.  Walking on the wild side these days, I tell ya.

I'm feeling every bit of this Friday night, because I have the dual conflict within: part wanting to put on some music, light all the candles I can scrounge and dance like no one's watching (because no one is...no one home but me); and part: having been pecked and pulled by people every bless-ed day, and having had to talk talk talk because it is in the unwritten job description, the contract that I must have signed with the invisible ink, detailing all that would be on my plate besides what was posted for the position, officially.

Part of me just wants to pull all my limbs in close and shush anyone that dares try start any kind of dialogue.  Just sssshhhhh...Let's just sit here, quiet-like, and stare at each other.  Yeah. That'd be nice.
When your 'normal' existence is really so outside of your own personal norm, it can be taxing, to say the least.  Take Wednesday, for example.

Up at 5, starting in on my planning, a rush to work, a 2-hour intensive class, where I am not exactly the bearer of glad tidings. A slight pause between the next class only to cram to get ready for the next 3-hour class, followed by a steady revolving door of people, more people - needing, needing, always neeeeeeeeeding.  'Do you have a minute?  (talks nonstop), 'Hey, I saw your door was open...', "So I just needed to get out of my office before I lost it (so I came down to bug you in yours so that you could lose it....), this went on AAAAALLLLLL DAY.  All day.  I never started anything.  Impossible.

Work DOES.NOT.HAPPEN.IN.THE.OFFICE.

So I revisit my recent trek to my happy place.  Often.  In my mind.

I am so much older now. 10 years my own senior.  I feel it.  I certainly look it, but the funny thing is - I'm becoming more and more okay with it too.

oh, hello

Adele.  You lovely gal, you.  Hello. From the other side.

Always Home

So this bod made its way to the shore once again.  It was a perfectly perfect time.  Well, except I came down with bronchitis AGAIN but this time en route (Really, lungs???  Now???) so there was no turning back like last May when it hit me right before a beach get-away.  No, I was fully committed, fully entrenched in traffic and a packed car, pointed due sunset on the Gulf.  Did I say it was perfect?  Yes, entirely.

Here are my 'girls'.  Four friends, waiting for the kaleidoscope to warm the sky.  This trip was 'girls only' - my Best Girl, her soon-to-be Maid of Honor (her kindred), a childhood friend, and a 'new' college bud.  The best four gals I could choose to spend four days with, at the beach, or anywhere.

I always adore being with folks who are 'chill', laid back and just as 'go with the flow' as I am when I am at the beach.  The plan is, there is no plan, and the idea is to stay in bathing suits ALL DAY, just eating veggies and wraps out of the cooler.  We soon lost track of time, and began to have to remind each other what day it was.  The biggest decision of the day - 50 spf or 20?

Such great talks - about God, purpose, the future, now, relationships, marriage, babies.  It reminded me of what it was like to stand on the cusp of so many of the biggest decisions of your life, wondering about the mystery of it all.  They had so many questions, and I was humbled to think they thought I had answers.

There was also plenty of laughter.  These girls are just FUN with a capital HILARIOUS.  'Yo daddy let you date???', and the crazy poses, smuggled S'mores, morning yoga and weddings crashed.  There was the mock wedding they conducted, right there on the beach - Rev. Della and her Chaco Bible, declaring, 'With the ambitions congested in me, I now pop drop and lock it.  I now declare you husband and wife.  You may now lick the bride -(arm thoroughly licked).

Finally, there was dancing.  Oh, yes - we danced.  My hope was to find a restaurant right on the sand, and to our delight, there was one just doors down from where we were staying.  Barefoot on the worn wooden deck, we let loose to an amazing live band, dancing and inviting older ladies to join us, and fending off sloppy drunk (sad, pitiful) guys.  We had no time for that.  Get out of our space - this is girl time.

It couldn't have been more perfect.

Wonders of the Whenever I Get Around to EVER Getting Here

Yeah, I realize.  I'm technically supposed to be vamoose from here.  A wisp.  A memory of blogged words of days gone by.  I do pass through blogworld like a ghost passes through doors, often.  I'm just not really here.

You know that song, 'You've Lost That Lovin' Feelin'?  Righteous Brothers.

Okay, if that's too far waaaay back, Top Gun?  Oh, I loved that movie back in the day.  This song:

 My song currently should be, 'I've Lost That Writin' Feelin'.  

So Wonders -

Writing

Nada.  Nothing.  Zip.  Doodly-squat.

Reading

Tons and tons and TONS of wedding blog and lists and things pertaining to ceremonial matrimony. 

I'm finding that I really love it, and recall when I once wanted to do event planning.

Listening

These last couple of weeks when summer literally fell out of the sky in the form of cascades of rain, I have been in a jazz/piano state of mind.  So with Mulled Cider candle burning, a few of these have been my 'go to' tunes.

And perfect for yet, more rain:

Watching

To beat cabin fever, Hubs and I went to see 'Everest' last night.  First, it was refreshing to sit through a movie that wasn't curse word laden.  It WAS intense, and honestly, I probably reacted more emotionally to it than the average viewer because I happen to have a son who LIVES to scale heights unknown, and mountaineer, and ropes climb, and other such insanity.  A little close to home.  Hit me in the feels.

Thinking

I really should get on that school work I dragged home.  Yes. I need to hop to it.  Let me get right to it.  Yep....

 Wanting

Wanting, being of want....what do I want?

Needing

You know, I really don't NEED a thing. Okay, well maybe someone to come repair the leak and the ceiling that is now bubbling from the leak....but I really don't need anything.  

Looking Forward To

I have a short get-away with my Best Girl and a few of her girlfriends coming up in short order.  Fall break - aaaahhh.  We're heading to the coast.  I will once again stand silent on surf's edge, and breathe.

Wearing

Navy blue leggings and a red top.  No, I didn't intend to go all patriotic.  AND I didn't wear said leggings out in public.  Home attire ONLY.  Chumfies at its finest.

Eating

Getting ready to have some butternut squash soup sprinkled with pumpkin seeds.  It's that kind of weather.

Drinking

I will be having coffee as soon as I can get that thing percolating.  

Quote of the Week

The trees are about to show us how lovely it is to let dead things go.

To My Brother

You'll never see this, I know.  But right now, I am thinking of you, and how much brothers and sisters bond and fight and love and hate and become the best of friends, eventually.

Remembering the concert just a couple of weeks ago, light years, it seems.  Sharing in a revelry of your best, growing up years - drivin n' cryin', and remembering my own survival days.

To the concert where they played your favorite song, and you told me it was on repeat in your playlist, because, the lyrics - so profound.

They played my favorite song too, and I danced with abandon there under the Southern night sky.

Thank you, for including me.





'Have you ever seen the 
Blue Ridge Mountains, boy
or the Chattahoochee
To the Honeysuckle Blue