1) A question will be posed daily here for the next two weeks (Why two weeks? Plenty of opportunity for ample questions but sets a time limit since this will have me here daily. Besides life is about to get slap crazy with real life cranking back up full steam.)
2) You can either answer in the comment section under the post OR post it as a writing prompt for your own blog but be sure to let me know in the comments and link it back here, pretty please.
3) As a bonus, you can ask me a question - anything! I'll answer it with your comment/question! This will count as a second entry! BUT - if you want to ask me a question, you HAVE to answer mine! :)
In summary, if you answer my question, that counts as one entry in the drawing. If you ask me something, it counts as two. Plenty of chances to win! The final question will be Sunday, August 5th in the morning. The drawing will take place some time that day, with a winner announced by midnight Eastern Time.
The cool thing is, YOU CAN JUMP IN ANYWHERE IN THE GIVE AWAY!! Hint, hint!! You don't have stand by silent!! In other words, if you're lurking around, reading all of this and trolling back months and months of posts, get crazy!! Jump in there and answer a question or two! It'd be fun! I promise!
Now for today's question - I had intended on getting it up here sooner, and actually had another one planned...and then today happened. So here goes: (warning - this one isn't quite so 'sunny' as summertime)
What overwhelms you? What are the stressors in your life, and what do you do to relieve stress and feelings of being overwhelmed?
Some of you who may have been around longer than a few months know that I was once a school teacher. When it nearly ate me alive, I was given an opportunity to not only change jobs but go part-time and that is what I did this past year. I am a professor, now teaching teachers (yes, the irony is so thick, I'm choking on it.) This past year, I had the chance to step back, and breathe and quite frankly heal from crippling stress and depression. One of my more popular posts details this very dark time for me and you can read it here: Palm of His Hand.
Things are quite different now, and in a million ways better for what I went through then. I finished last year with the idea that I would be going into another part-time year, and honestly, I was relieved. A month ago or so, that changed, and I was offered full-time. After much deliberation and struggle, I accepted. I'm not so sure about this decision, but I keep telling myself there is a reason.
I went today for a brief meeting, and to get going with what I needed to do to pick up two more classes. I left so overwhelmed (familiar echo from the previous time) that I drove home looking through tears. I know all of this will make sense, and I do believe that we are presented with things repeatedly some times so that we can learn from it, but I am hesitant to walk this road again.
So what do I do, or have I done to combat stress? Over the years, the things that help me most rotate but in college, I would go to the park and swing. Or color in a coloring book. With the mega whoopin' 64 pack of crayons. I've driven fast (not good, and I don't do that anymore...). I like to hear glass breaking, so I'm in charge of recycling. I also hurl over-ripe produce off my back deck, aiming to splat it on the tree front and center. I also run. I think that I would also very much like boxing, so I might get a punching bag and string it up in the basement.
So I might just train to be the next act on America's Got Talent, because I'll be the most talented page-coloring, glass and fruit tosser, boxing running singer, doing all of this at once.
I promise: Tomorrow's question won't be so 'heavy'.
Things are quite different now, and in a million ways better for what I went through then. I finished last year with the idea that I would be going into another part-time year, and honestly, I was relieved. A month ago or so, that changed, and I was offered full-time. After much deliberation and struggle, I accepted. I'm not so sure about this decision, but I keep telling myself there is a reason.
I went today for a brief meeting, and to get going with what I needed to do to pick up two more classes. I left so overwhelmed (familiar echo from the previous time) that I drove home looking through tears. I know all of this will make sense, and I do believe that we are presented with things repeatedly some times so that we can learn from it, but I am hesitant to walk this road again.
So what do I do, or have I done to combat stress? Over the years, the things that help me most rotate but in college, I would go to the park and swing. Or color in a coloring book. With the mega whoopin' 64 pack of crayons. I've driven fast (not good, and I don't do that anymore...). I like to hear glass breaking, so I'm in charge of recycling. I also hurl over-ripe produce off my back deck, aiming to splat it on the tree front and center. I also run. I think that I would also very much like boxing, so I might get a punching bag and string it up in the basement.
So I might just train to be the next act on America's Got Talent, because I'll be the most talented page-coloring, glass and fruit tosser, boxing running singer, doing all of this at once.
I promise: Tomorrow's question won't be so 'heavy'.
this is HEAVY....but I will do my best.
ReplyDeleteWHAT OVERWHELMS ME:
Making decisions tops my list. I am not good at it. Knowing a decision needs to be made is overwhelming. Second guessing my decision is overwhelming. Living with the aftermath is overwhelming. Answering this question is overwhelming....LOL so,
next....
WHAT ARE THE STRESSORS IN MY LIFE.
My current situation is a stressor. There are times money is a stressor. There are days my job is a stressor. Not knowing what to do is a stressor (hey, are we back to the decision making thing again?)....
lastly...
A STRESS RELIEVER
If my husband is not the cause of my stress, then a ride on the Harley does the trick. I need him there, since he's the driver and I'm the rider. Also, taking a drive in the car, windows down, radio playing, helps. A dip in the pool. A hot bath. or just talking it out with someone who will listen helps. Sometimes just getting it out lifts a lot of weight off the shoulders. And I don't know about you, but my shoulders get mighty heavy at times.
NOW A QUESTION FOR YOU:
What made you ultimately decide to take the full time job?
Whatever the reason, I hope it works out for you. It obviously was a hard decision.
I love what you said "I believe that we are presented with things repeatedly some times so that we can learn from it..."
I think I've learned some things....through bad decisions (see, there's that decision thing again)...finally. It's about time.
Until tomorrow....good night CLR
I look forward to your next NOT SO HEAVY question
You did GREAT! Thanks for hanging with me when the topic wasn't so happy, happy, joy, joy.
Delete:)
I figure that with most people, jobs/money are top stressors for most. What I get overwhelmed with a lot of the time is the beginning of something - school, new project, that room full of junk and disorganization that has to be dealt with and organized...so that's where I am and the overwhelm sets in. Making decisions is one of my stronger qualities, I guess. (not that I don't second guess them some times...like now...) but I'm generally 'that' gal in a gaggle of women who are trying to decide where to go to dinner, "Oh it doesn't matter. What do YOU want to do?" that says, 'Okay, look - we have 3 choices within walking distance. Pick one. No? Okay, let's go here." Ha ha - funny thing is, that wasn't always my way. I would internally boil thinking, 'Pick something!' and then be all, "Oh, I don't know! Doesn't matter!" :) Now, I just say it. Feels much better that way!
Yes, I also like to talk it out, or write about it and it helps. And yes, my shoulders droop to my knees sometimes as well. Glad we have each other to help hold them up. :)
Good question! That's the million dollar one, isn't it? Ha ha! No, I guess I probably gave an impression that I abhorred what I do...not quite. Once I got started (there's that beginning thing again), I got into it and had quite a few highlights once the year got going. Mainly, the interaction and the getting to know the students was the absolute best. To have them come to me, and tell me that I made a difference for them was priceless. What I don't love so much about it, and the nature of working in education in general, is that there is no head room for anything else. It is consuming, and I have learned (through this) that I NEED head room for thinking the bigger things that fire and inspire me.
So why did I take it? I tried to remember the good things and I do love learning and in all honesty too, it is a means to an end. I do plan to explain more in a separate post, but it does have to do with Nicaragua and also by going full-time my kiddos (now college age and senior in high school) can go there and have a college degree debt-free when they are done.
I've got an 'up' question coming right up! Thanks for sticking with me!
We own a business (a restaurant) so we have our own stress plus everyone elses to deal with. I get easy distracted with all of the little silly things and let them get to me. Fortunately, my husband loves a challenge (hence his marriage to me) and takes it upon himself to take my stress. In turn, I take care of most of the household chores and he works more at the restaurant.
ReplyDeleteI sleep. I have a few drinks. I yell. I cry.
I am not proud of these things but you want honesty, right?
I also get massages, an occasional pedi/mani or a mini trip with a friend/sister/or husband. And sex is a useful tool as well.
Gold stars for you and Robin for digging in with me in all my overwhelmedness and pulling me right out! Or climbing right in with me, whichever way you look at it!
DeleteOwning a restaurant has GOT to be stressful...whew. We had some really good friends that had one years ago, and we saw it first hand. While they loved it, it was almost constant stress. I've often thought that I could easily go back to waitressing though - it's a hard and thankless job, but at the end of the day, you get to go home with nothing but the stink of grease and food on you, and that's remedied by a nice hot shower or bath. I am quite liking the idea of working incredibly hard at a job, getting to actually see results (doesn't happen as concretely in education all the time) and 'clock out' so to speak and be done for the day. I fantasized all day yesterday about just mowing lawns as a business. Give me a mower, some sunshine, headphones, and perfectly straight lines in a neatly manicured lawn...I'd get exercise, fresh air, space to think and listen to tunes, and I dang sure can't carry someone's yard home with me to mow in the wee hours of the night! Ha ha.
Oh yeah - I cry. And when I get overwhelmed, suddenly EVERYTHING that could possibly be askew in the world comes to mind and I am a blur of tears and 'doom', snot and 'oh my gosh, I"m gonna die!" Hubs gets that and has learned to remind me to focus on one thing. That and 'go do something else' and it seems to help. I"m sure he'd love it if that one thing was sex! Ha ha!
Thanks for being a trooper, and a lighter question is on the way!
I get overwhelmed the most by money issues. My solution (not a good one!) is to ignore the problems and hope they'll get better, which, in turn, produces more stress. I've got to get this stuff under control!
ReplyDeleteMy best stress relief, though, is going for a walk or a hike or a run. I think the combination of fresh air and excercise does wonders.
Hello new person! :) SO glad you dropped by and decided to jump in!
DeleteI hear you on getting money issues under control - I"m with you when it comes to getting my checkbook straight. I LOATHE that chore more than anything else! And I do the same thing - avoid, avoid, avoid...until it is a monster that takes over (speaking of, I need to get on that right now. And what am I doing?)
Great stress relievers! Anything outside is a good thing!
Thanks for jumping in! Feel free to come back and be a part! You now have an entry into drawing for the hammock! :)
Hello, my friend. I was busy yesterday with the kid.
ReplyDeleteAs much as you would think farming is a carefree and easy lifestyle it isn't so much. I find I'm getting to be a little like you. Dreading each new job that comes up. Once I get into them though, I don't mind it so much. But still, trying to decide on crop rotations, what fertilizers to use, what chemicals to spray with, What type of crop insurance to buy, dealing with marketing and pastures and neighbours offering higher rent to try scoop the land that you rent. Then I live here, on the farm yard, so it doesn't really ever go away. There's hoping that most of the decisions you make are fair so there's money to keep paying for things. Some day's it's prettty tough to deal with and can drive you into depression or the looney bin if you get too tied up in everything. Someplace, I read that the suicide rate among those in the field of agriculture is right up there near the top of all trades. I've never gone down that far but I have had to deal with depression and It isn't fun. On bad days I just stop. Stop doing anything and getting restarted can be so difficult.
BUT. There's also times, when you're out in the field, alone in a tractor with the radio and no cell service along side the river. Or, sitting in the pasture waiting for a cow to give birth to a wobbly legged calf, everything seems worth it?
What do I do? I come and dump all my crap on this wonderful lady in her hammock! That's what! ;)
Seriously, I've found holidays are awesome de-stressors. On the plane with the wheels up does wonders for my soul. I would like to, and am trying to connect more with friends. Taking an evening to just interact. Maybe that's why we're all here?
NOW! to completely go in another direction and lighten the mood, my question to you is ...wax or pencil crayons? :)
Kimosabe, no worries! We all have kids and checkbooks to tackle and jobs that steal our time and energy! Be here when you can!
DeleteI never would have thought farming was particularly easy, but WOW!! That sounds VERY involved - yikes! It is way more than 'plant a little seed, throw a little water on it, and ride off into the sunset on your tractor' apparently. So good for you to get word out, and I never knew that the depression/suicide rate was so high among those in agriculture. Wow...same thing in my world as far as the astronomical number of educators on some form of antidepressant. Most all I know are. I went that route for a year. You're absolutely right - dealing with depression is not fun.
It's good you can look for those silver linings of your job, and it really does come down to perspective. I am trying to do the same, for the time being that I am doing this, I need to find the positive and I'm trying. In all honesty, I wonder if there really is that 'dream' occupation out there, free of all strife and mundane?
I hear you on the travel/vacation front, and there's been some dialogue here about that - those with the ability to, and those that don't. So there's that for some. Since I know first hand how it restores me, I squirrel away and do what I can to be able to go. I would love for more people to be able to as well.
LOVE your question: wax, of course. I adored the big 64 set of crayons, and there is NOTHING better than a brand new box, full of all those gleaming, sharp point crayons. The color I gravitated to most for as long as I can remember? Sky blue. ;)
Oh, and you can come and share here any day - :) I count it a privilege!!!
DeleteIf I listed all of my stressors I'd take up all the room on the internet. I have a pretty extreme anxiety disorder. I can't stand loud, crowded places, which makes it hard to see live music. If I go to a restaurant and it's too loud I have to leave. I need everything in my house just so.
ReplyDeleteTo relieve stress I do acupuncture, take a probiotic, and I meditate often. It makes it so I can function. But I'm almost always on edge. A glass of wine seems to help that now that I've taken to having a glass again every now and then.
What I love about you is your determination to overcome, and that comes through. You may have all those things you deal with (the anxiety, for example) but you strive to rise above them. Amazing. Many people let it keep them down.
DeleteAcupuncture! That's one thing I haven't tried but have thought about doing recently! Very cool!
With that edginess, not to get too personal or anything, but ever had your hormones checked out? That can cause that 'I want to rip someone's lips off' feeling that can simmer juuuust below the surface. Ha ha! Ask me how I know.
I have had my hormones check. I do have high androgen levels. Always have. But I have a gazillion mental issues as well. Go me!
DeleteDo you get the high levels treated/balanced in any way? I get so frustrated because doctors (a lot of them) just brush off hormones and not address them when they influence SO MUCH in our health and mental well-being. Reason I'm all over this hormone thing.
DeleteHa ha - yes, yay you, because you seem to handle those things so well!
I am the most unorganized person on the planet. I try to organize so many things but the task is overwhelming. If only I could be a little more systematic... Lately I'm trying to write down the six most important things list. I rarely accomplish all six but then I'm moving undone things to my next day list and eventually they are done.
ReplyDeleteEvalina, This and that...
Hello!! Glad you jumped in with us!
DeleteI so hear you on being unorganized. I used to be quite good at it, and it all disappeared a few years ago. I don't know what happened!! Systematic is the key, and then sticking with it. That's the hard part for me.
I think it will now always have to be something I work at and keep doing. Work in progress!
What stresses me.... never feeling like I have the time to do all the things i want to do, feeling defeated at the end of day. What helps... prayer, sleep, and starting each new day with hope for being more organized, and forgiving myself for not being perfect.
ReplyDeleteA question.... In what ways would you like your children to be different thany you or to choose differently than you have?
As my Hubs so exuberantly states, 'It's a new day!!!' He has taught me the visual picture of 'mercies are new every morning' and I am honestly trying to embrace that fully more now. Ooo, and that forgive yourself thing...yeah. Still a work in progress.
DeleteYou ARE the QUEEN of questions!!! What an incredible thought!! Okay, what I am going to do is compile the questions coming in since I am trying to catch up a bit and answer them all at once, referencing each author of the question. :)
Sometimes every day life is what really stresses me out. I don't like my job at all, but I'm pretty much stuck with it, so work feels like a big cause of stress most days. I also feel like I'm usually not getting everything done that needs (or that I want) to be done.
ReplyDeleteI don't really have a solution for the work stress, other than coming home to a quiet house and trying really hard not to think about work while I'm home. I'm trying to get more organized and better at time management to help with the daily life stress.
Oh my word, I am can so relate to the job thing. Maybe not now, but I could tell you stories of being in a job I really didn't like, and feeling so stuck. I also try to overcome by being more organized and all, but I struggle with that for some reason now in my life so I don't know. I guess the key is to keep working at it.
ReplyDeleteI am seeing a common theme among the women bloggers commenting that this feeling of needing to get tons done, getting everything done, checking lists, etc. and the stress this causes. You've just given me a future post idea...so THANK YOU!!! :)
While it is cliche, the most overwhelming thing for me is my children. Specifically my oldest. He can set me off like no one in the world has ever been able to do. After years of his issues and trying to diagnose and deal with them, I finally feel like I have a handle on most of it, but occasionally just the smallest thing from him can trigger memories of years of hardship that will set me off immediately. I try to control it with a positive thought process, reminding myself that only I can control my actions, but it doesn't always work. Other stressors in my life are a husband who works a lot, a family who I am very close to but who I have an overly emotional response to, other people who are filled with hate and anger, and of course my diet. It is all very hard, but it is so much easier than the worst stressor of my life: my mom dying and having to take her off life support. That doesn't even fall into the "stress" field really because it's so much more.
ReplyDeleteAs far as what I do to combat it, remembering to breathe is key. I learned in therapy that much of anxiety is due to the person forgetting to breath or breathing to shallowly. I also have a constant conversation going on in my head about what is right, good, deep, and fulfilling. Negativity begets negativity, and it is hard for me to remember that all the time. I also enjoy having adult beverages at the end of a very weary week in an attempt to unwind and forget, if only for a while.
Question for you: what happened in your life that helped you become a runner and make it a permanent part of your life? Did something happen that prompted you to turn to running, or was it always part of you?
Ah children - yes - I had one of those that knew every button, and because of 'issues' (that post is upcoming) his childhood was hard. Today - he is a completely transformed 19 year old, but he still has add tendencies that has me worried he won't be able to function and keep up with his belongings...and then I look at him and he's working two jobs to get to what he has set out to do, and not a complaint from his mouth about that or when I ask him to do something.....and I just keep at it, being mom, working with him on trying to keep his stuff organized.
ReplyDeleteI am with you too, on the negativity. I am getting to where I can hardly be near it. It is such as waste of time and energy.
You're the second person that mentioned a mother passing away.....I can't even think about it...I honestly hope that you and Funny are still 'around' here when that day comes. I am not kidding. I don't know how to face that because I block out the very thought.
Breathing. Very good. Adult beverages. Check. Thank you, Jesus, for wine.
Your question is AWESOME. I have been so excited about the questions everyone is posing. What I am doing is noting them and will answer them in a culminating post at the end of the contest. I will most likely take some time away after the contest (I am traveling right after...) and that will give everyone reading material!! Ha ha.
Oh, never think about your mom's passing! Just relish every second - even the hard ones - because they all matter. My only suggestion, especially since you are a writer, is to get all her stories written down. If you can get them recorded in her voice or on video that is even better. My mom was the last in her family line who knew all the stories of her parents, grandparents, and ancient family, and I was the one she shared with the most because as a teenager I preferred to stay home with my BFF or just chill with my mom. I'm so glad I did that because I have stories none of my sisters remember. I just wish I had them straight from Mom's mouth and in her words because she was hilarious. So, make sure to get the stories and recipes you want, and be sure to ask her any question you've ever had about how she became the woman she is because no one else in the world can ever answer those questions.
Delete